Our retreat is not something extraordinary. What we hear is common to us. We have heard it many times. Yet, its ordinariness and commonness has the power to touch the core of our being. For who could fathom the depth of the Paschal Mystery? Conscious or not conscious, it is an experience of our day to day life. This mystery invites us to become more like Jesus, to live His life more deeply, to pattern our life in His life, to become aware with greater consciousness that the life we have chosen is just the life we will be living in the next.
Thinking about how Jesus suffers, and to suffer the same way He did, I felt I would not be able to endure it. It’s too horrible! Yet God did not ask me to carry the same weight of the cross He carried. He only asked what is enough for me to carry; He did not give anything which beyond my strength. God made me carry different kinds of crosses, small, big, heavy, light, but these never surpassed my strength. Now God gave me another cross which Fr Tony Lambino, our retreat master, mentioned as the third mission: the PASSION. As far as I remember, I was never given a great mission or an extraordinary one. Just an ordinary mission, common to everyone. What makes it extraordinary is that it has a purpose that I – and only I – have been given the task to fulfil. The mission of the Passion as Fr Lambino told me, is my mission now to be united in the Passion of Christ – that eventually would help me emerge into new a life: the Resurrection.
I pray and ask God that during this time of darkness I may be able to live as I ought to, until the light comes where I can clearly see the purpose and meaning of why He has chosen me to have this dreaded disease – the Big C: Cancer.
Sr M Marilyn Felizardo fdz
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